The first question:
You say we cannot take full responsibility for ourselves until we are “awakened.” The Western growth movement says we cannot be awakened until we take full responsibility for ourselves. Is there a conflict?
There is no conflict at all – it is just seeing the same phenomenon from two different angles. They are two aspects of the same event; they are together, they are simultaneous. There is no contrariness in them: they are complementary.
When I say you can take full responsibility for yourselves only when you are awakened, I mean that you don’t even know who you are – how can you take responsibility for something you are not even aware of? You are acquainted only with the tip of the iceberg – how can you take responsibility for the unconscious, which is nine times more than the conscious? The conscious, at the most, can take responsibility for the conscious. Even that is difficult because it is constantly influenced by the unconscious. You are pulled, dragged into things by the unconscious – you don’t know why.
You fall in love with a man or a woman – how can you take responsibility for it? because falling in love is not a conscious decision on your part. It is an unconscious phenomenon. It simply overwhelms you; suddenly one day, you find that you are in love. You have not done anything for it, you have not prepared for it, you were not planning for it. It comes out of nowhere, out of the blue…and you are possessed by it, you are madly possessed by it. How can you take responsibility for your love? Love comes from roots about which you are not aware.
That’s why I say unless you are awakened you will not be able to take total responsibility. Your responsibility will be fragmentary, superficial, shallow.
And the growth movement people are also true: they say we cannot be awakened until we take full responsibility for ourselves. Yes, how will you be awakened? You have to start taking responsibility. It cannot be total right now – let it be partial. It cannot be absolute right now – let it not be absolute. It can only be fragmentary; it cannot be total. No need to worry. Even a fragmentary responsibility is far better than irresponsibility. Even to be aware about a small part of your being is far better than not to be aware.
The choice is not between total awareness and partial awareness: the choice before you is between partial awareness and no awareness. Choose partial awareness; that’s what the growth people say – they are true. And when you choose to be responsible for a few things, you will become a little more alert. When you become a little more alert, you will be able to become a little more responsible…and so on and so forth.