The other morning you were talking so beautifully about two meditators being together in love. For me, sitting with you every day is so fulfilling that my desire to be with someone has almost disappeared. This is happening to me every time I am around you. Today though, the fear arose that I am too miserly with my love and therefore avoiding a relationship. Beloved Osho, is this possible?
One has to be very much aware of the mind creating problems which do not exist in reality. Mind is almost a problem-creating factory; whatever you do, whatever happens to you, mind is going to raise problems about it. That’s its old strategy to disturb you.
If you are feeling perfectly okay, then listen to the heart, not to the mind. One has to learn the knack of not paying too much attention to the mind, trying in every possible way to listen to the heart.
Your question is that for you, sitting with me every day is so fulfilling that your desire to be with someone else has almost disappeared.
It is how it should be. The desire for the other is not something great. It is poverty of the soul. You cannot be alone; hence, the desire for the other arises. Because you cannot feel peaceful, silent, centered, fulfilled, contented, just by being yourself, the desire arises to be with someone; perhaps someone can give you what you are missing.
Nobody can give you what you are missing. Most probably you will meet another beggar, just like you, who has been in search of someone who can give him fulfillment, contentment, blissfulness. And when two beggars start begging from each other it is really a pitiable scene, but it is being repeated by millions of people around the earth every day. Because you are brought up by these beggars, amongst these beggars, when for the first time you start getting out of this begging, the mind wants to pull you back. It raises questions, doubts; it persuades you with beautiful names.
For example, now your mind is saying, “Today though, the fear arose that I am too miserly with my love and therefore avoiding a relationship.” If you have love enough it will start showering on others by itself. You cannot contain it; it becomes an overflowing, so there is no need to worry about it.
Nobody can be miserly with love.
Let me repeat it: nobody can be miserly with their love. Either one has love – then it starts overflowing in its own time; you don’t have to push it, you don’t have to force it – or one has not. When one has not, one can only pretend. Millions of people are doing that. Everybody is pretending to love and they have not known what love is.
Love can be known only as a fragrance of meditation, not before it. You have not known even the flower. You are not acquainted with the fragrance. Once the flower opens up, it is beyond the capacity of the flower to be miserly about fragrance – what can it do? The fragrance will go with the winds, it will spread all over.