In these groups we are just trying to do the opposite. In fact the whole effort is that they should stop depending on the leader; rather they should reclaim their right to be themselves. So here the leader is doing something that no leader will do: he is destroying the very base of leadership – and that’s the point to be understood. We are trying to help people in such a way that they become independent, that they come to a point where help is not needed; where they can thank you, can feel grateful, and can say good-bye.
Society has made people helpless, impotent. And the fear has been implanted so deeply that they are always looking for somebody else to decide for them – some expert, some guide, somebody who can say “do this.” Then they are okay; they know that somebody who knows is saying it.
This brings up the conflict that I have with you, you see. I don’t know if I need you…I think I do, but then I hear you say these things, and I think that you’re teaching me that I don’t need you.
I am teaching you that you don’t need me – but for this much you need me. And this is the whole effort – to make you free. I take your hand in my hand, but not to keep for ever and ever, because that will be a bondage to you and a burden to me. It will not make you free, and it will make me a prisoner as well as you. I take your hand to leave it as soon as possible. And my whole blessing and my whole prayer is that the sooner you become capable of my leaving your hand…
And I just leave this time up to you?
You have to leave it to me, because if you decide there is every possibility that the ego will decide, and that’s the trouble. If the ego decides, you will leave my hand before the time is right and then you will remain dependent.
See, the trick that goes in my head is that you will hold my hand until I begin to take it away. At that point you will say yes – but I have to do the pulling away.
That is the ego that is creating a new hold for itself – that you will have to do something.
No, the moment you are ready you will not find my hand anywhere. In fact I should not say it right now, but my hand is not there at all. The moment you are ready you will find you are completely free – nobody was holding your hand….
This too is the same game of the ego – it will suspect, it will say that you have to do something, that you have to take your own hand away, and all these things will go on and on and on. Just listen to it, and don’t cooperate with it. Just time is needed. Good, Satprem.
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