The first question:
I am a judge. Have I any chance of ever entering nirvana? If your answer is no, then I can change my profession; I can become a doctor. I am also trained as a homeopath.
There is no record of any judge ever entering nirvana. Just because of you, the whole night I had to look in the Akashic records again! I could only find one thing in them:
Satan and St. Peter decided to hold a soccer game in paradise. It was to be hell versus heaven.
When everything had been arranged, St. Peter said to Satan, “Look, I can’t be dishonest with you. There is no way that your side can win. All soccer players are simple, pure people and when they die, they all go to heaven. Heaven is full of soccer players.”
“I thank you for your sincerity,” replied Satan “but don’t worry, we can defend ourselves.”
When St. Peter had left, Satan’s secretary said, “St. Peter is right – we will lose the game. All the good soccer players go to heaven.”
“Don’t worry,” said Satan. “Where do you think all the judges go?”
Changing your profession from judge to doctor is not going to help you either! About that also there is a reference in the Akashic records.
A doctor came to heaven’s door. St. Peter looked at the guy, asked his profession and said, “Wrong door son. Please go to hell.”
The doctor was puzzled, looked very confused and said, “But I went there first and they said, ‘Go to the other door.’”
“I know,” said St. Peter, “they meant the back door.”
“But why?” asked the doctor.
St. Peter said, “That is the entrance for the suppliers.”